Lookin' Good, Seeker
by Inanis Incedeco
Summary: Cassandra gets her heart broken when the Inquisitor goes for another woman, and goes on a long journey of self-discovery. (Ultimately Cassandra/Sera, also includes Cassandra/Iron Bull and a couple of other pairings)
Cassandra's heart ached.

For the first time in so very long, she had fallen in love. Not an attraction, not simply enjoying another's company. _Love_. It had begun just like one of Varric's torrid stories, him as a prisoner before her, eyes wide and sad as he realized the full enormity of his actions. When he had been freed, he had stolen her heart, albeit accidentally.

When he had admitted to having had a husband, it had hurt a little, but she had shrugged it off then. Now he was dead, and she had regained some small hope, especially since he was a suave man who effortlessly flirted and charmed those around him, especially after the year after the battle of Haven had ended. He had even passed a few compliments her way, and always been there when she needed him.

And here he was. Kissing a woman, right in front of her. Cantis, the now Inquisitor, was sharing an intimate moment in the Gardens with his ambassador, Josephine, sitting there and sharing himself with her. The way Cassandra had always wanted him to do to her, on another woman, as she watched from the alcoves.

How could he? She had done everything… hadn't she? Been there when he needed someone, always there to listen to questions, laugh with and share drinks late into the night. She had been so sure they had been meant for one another, and now they were here. All those times she had fantasized about him, his tender kiss, his hard cock inside of her as her hips rolled, begging with incoherent babbling…

She couldn't take it anymore. Watching him sit and share what she had wanted with another woman, grasping at her gold silk leggings… no, she couldn't watch this. Soon the announcement would come, they would tell people, and she needed to be ready, so as not to look so angry, so vehement.

"Damn it." She whispered, biting down tears as she ran away.

Cassandra threw open the door, slamming it behind her, unbuckling her armour and tossing it away. She felt betrayed, but more than that she felt… _stupid_. What she had felt was real, surely. And he obviously liked women, as he had clearly demonstrated. That meant that the blame fell solely on her, didn't it? She had never said anything, too scared of being hurt, and now she had been devastated. At least she could have heard a rejection from him personally, instead of this, and could have had a chance.

"Idiot." She seethed, throwing herself down onto her bed, sobbing freely into her pillows. "Stupid… should have said something..." She shook her head. "This is my fault."

More than grief, something stirred in her. Frustration, of a sort. The kind she had felt ever since Regalyan died. Perhaps even sooner than that. Being the Right Hand of the Divine had kept her isolated, and she hadn't felt another in private intimacy for years, leaving her with only her own right hand.

And now it felt as if she never would again.

"Fuck." She growled, no longer keeping her tongue in check, and ripped down her pants. "If I can't have him, I'll have me." Normally, this began slow and comfortable, teasing herself up and towards arousal, moving faster once she began to peak until her body began to surrender. But that wasn't for tonight, oh no. Tonight was about anger, passion.

She ran a finger over her clit, pressing down on it, and immediately brought another, pinching it until pain and pleasure joined together. _Yes, that was it._ Exactly what she needed today. Punishment.

Pain. Submission.

"Whore." She hissed, pinching a tit with her other hand, rolling it between fingers until it too ached for more. She caressed her outer lips a moment, then pushed down and inside. "Yes." she purred. "That's it… more."

Alone, in such a compromising position, she allowed herself to think of him once more. Even if he was out there with… her… he would still love her in her imagination. All she wanted right now was for a man to break her.

 _He rips off my clothes_. Cassandra gasped, penetrating herself while she fantasized. _Throwing me onto the bed, onto my back, spreading her legs and putting them on his shoulders. Maker, but he's attractive, built and handsome. Not to mention how big and thick his cock was, putting it at her entrance and pushing forward_.

"Maker's breath." She thrashed her legs, closing her eyes and leaving her hand to preform it's minstrations. She began to lose track of what her clever fingers were doing, curling her fingers up and pressing her palm down onto her clit while fingers worked, letting out slow and heavy moans. "I want… more." To feel him deep inside, until it hurt.

 _His hands reached up and wrapped around her breasts, squeezing the nipples until she squealed, throwing her head back as he thrusted faster and faster. Then to flip her over onto her stomach, forcing her onto her hands and knees, beginning to fuck her from behind._

Her breathing came in short, painful gasps now, moving in a third fingers and moving faster and faster as her imagination consumed all.

 _He growls, taking her further and deeper now that she had bent over for him. Down came his hand, spanking her, as he began to call her filthy names. Then he came at her, pulling and yanking her hair, slowing now to make every thrust deep and heavy. He would bite her ear, and she would revel in it, listening to his whispers as he informed her that she was his, and no one else's._

That did it for her. Loneliness and anger balled into a fast, heavy orgasm. She spread her legs, resisting a moment before giving herself over to the orgasm. Her mind was taken, filled only with pleasure. Waves of pleasure started in her centre, and began to roll outward to her whole body, hips jerking as a thin, clear stream squirted forth. Pulsing began deep in her pussy, and a light burst out from behind her tightly closed eyes. Her breath came in short gasps, heart pounding.

Then she rolled over, pulling a blanket over as she hated herself.


End file.
